Ellen, my
ravishing bride, is not afraid to jeopardize a comfortable surface-level
conversation to let you know you've got something in your teeth. She's like
that. She keeps it real. Myself, I would either A. not notice (most likely) or
B. be too worried about making things awkward to say anything.
We humans
like relationships like that. We like people to tell us the truth. We all
engage in the shallow "How's the weather?"-banter once in a while but establishing a
real connection involves a bit of risk. To quote Kris Vallotton, Senior Associate Pastor of Bethel Church (Redding, CA) "You can
only love someone to the depths you are willing to suffer for that
person." Essentially, the more you love someone, the more of your heart
you are trusting them with and giving them the choice of how to take care of
it. Keeping it real often leaves you and/or the other person vulnerable to
hurt.
All
throughout the bible, we see God's desire for this type of real, personal
relationship with us. He doesn't just want robots following His protocol; He
wants interaction, two-way communication, your opinions, your thoughts, your
emotions, your heart.
Some time
ago, I had this real itch to experience my relationship with God in a more real
way. I wanted Him to speak to me, point
me in a direction, confirm something, I don't know, maybe part one of our
10,000 Minnesotan seas or something, anything! It just wasn't happening. Then
one day, while praying fervently for some heavenly involvement...
Me:
"What's going on, God? Where have you been? This isn't like You. You used
to be so evident everywhere I went. You came through when we needed money, You
helped me get that job. You gave me the right words to talk to people about
you. You healed my hand. Why can't you be more real with me again?"
All of
the sudden I get a reply...
God:
"You first."
Me: "....wha...
wha... wait, what was that?"
God:
"You be real with me first."
Thunk
went the arrow to my heart. Just like that He'd cut to source of my roadblock.
There
were things I hadn't told Him about; things getting in the way of our
relationship that hadn't even occurred to me before. My mind started racing
through decisions I'd made without bringing Him into it, sins I'd committed,
people I had hurt, and here I was, praying what now seemed like a shallow
prayer, asking God why He wasn't being real. Needless to say, my prayer time
went on for quite a while after that.
You can't
fool God. You can't hide from Him, You can't run from Him, there's simply no
escaping His gaze. Not because He wants to ΓΌber-micromanage
you, but because He's captivated with you. Crazy about you like a parent is for
their child. His rooting for you all along the way, cheering for your success,
and sharing in your pain.
So why
not be real with Him? What's holding us back? Yes, God is to be revered, exalted, honored, bowed down to,
served, but can we also talk to him like a friend? Can we let Him know when
we're mad at Him? Can we gossip with Him? Can we ask Him dumb questions like
"Why did You make the platypus?" Does he have a sense of humor? Does
the previous question answer that?
How did
this concept of keeping it real hold up in the context of the bible?
Right
from the get-go God's original design for humanity was to be hanging out with
Him in the perfect garden. He put man and woman in a place where they were
totally provided for and He could visit them on a regular basis. On purpose, He
put the tree of the knowledge of good and evil there, trusting Adam & Eve
not to eat its fruit, thus giving them the choice
to obey Him. See freedom isn't in the absence of restrictions but in the
presence of options. He gave us the freedom to break His heart. Trust, the
foundation of a relationship.
Fast
forward to Genesis 18:17. It is almost as if God is monologue-ing and having a
crisis of conscience:
“'Should I hide my plan from
Abraham?' the Lord asked."
Don't ask
me who overheard that heavenly rhetorical question but it's in scripture. God
was debating whether or not to put Abraham in the loop on His Executive
decision regarding Sodom and Gomorra. His conclusion to bring Abraham in on it
resulted in an interaction that one could argue was not even necessary
considering the outcome. With utmost respect and honor, Abraham
"barters" with God about how many righteous people would deem Sodom
and Gomorra worthy of saving. He ultimately brings Him down from 50 to 10. What
is so interesting about this to me is that God knew all along that even 10 was
too high, but He still entertained the conversation. Ultimately, God's angel's
had to forcibly extract Abraham's complacent son, Lot, and his family before
destroying the cities. God didn't have to tell Abraham His plan, but choose to because they had a relationship and that's what friends do.
I should
note that, because of Jesus opening the door for everyone to have a direct
relationship with God, we can take comfort knowing God doesn't exact justice
with fire and brimstone anymore. Jesus died for EVERYONE's sins so that NONE
should perish but have the opportunity to choose him and have everlasting life. We aren't judged by our obedience to laws anymore but by our relationship with Jesus, out of which beautifully comes loving obedience to the heart behind the laws. John 5:22 NKJV "For the Father judges no one, but has committed all judgment
to the Son, that all should honor the Son just as they honor the Father."
Thank you Jesus.
Another
shining example of God's value on relationship with His people is Moses
(emphasis on shining, hehe). I mean, I could just reference Exodus 33:11 which
says "So the Lord spoke to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his
friend." but I prefer to reference one of the most theology-shattering
passages in the bible:
"So
the Lord changed his mind about the terrible disaster he had threatened to
bring on his people." Exodus 32:14
Can God
change His mind? Think about that for... your whole life, because you're never
going to figure it out. UNLESS, you put it in context. Remember, God loves
relationship; it's why He created us and said that it was good. The verses
leading up to that one tell it all.
Moses is
up there on the mountaintop with the rather tangible presence of God (see
smoke, fire, earthquakes, and lightning) transcribing an encyclopedia of laws
and decrees and, within the amount of time Moses is gone, the people grow
restless and decide they want to serve a golden calf of their own creation instead of God.
Just having delivered the 10 commandments, the first of which is "You
shall have no other gods before me.", God is ready to uphold his end of the
deal.
This is where Moses steps in. Moses pleas with God, reminding Him of His own
promises to deliver them to the Promised Land... and God changed His mind. His
relationship with one man trumped the laws he had put in place. If it weren't
for men who found favor in God's eyes and pled for the rest of us, we wouldn't
be here (see Jesus).
One last
example. We'll jump to the New Testament with this one: John. Or should I say, "the disciple whom Jesus loved"? That's right, if you read the gospel according
to John you'll notice that John, being the author, refers to himself in the 3rd
person as "the disciple whom Jesus loved"...
The disciple Jesus loved was sitting next to Jesus at the table. (John 13:23 NLT)
When
Jesus therefore saw His mother, and the disciple
whom He loved standing by, He said to His mother, “Woman, behold your son!”
(John 19:26 NKJV)
Therefore
that disciple whom Jesus loved said
to Peter, “It is the Lord!”... (John 21:7 NKJV)
Knowing
this, one might prescribe John with some pride issues, or at least an odd case
of 3rd-person-itis. I'm pretty sure I would be labeled as such if I went around
saying "Hark, the one who rocks at video games requests that you pass the
butter." But the real interesting part about this is that the bible's
Editor in Chief let the self-designated title slide. There was something so
deeply personal about John's relationship with Jesus that he set himself apart
from the rest of the disciples as having a unique connection to Jesus. He
belonged to Jesus and he knew it.
In fact,
the book of John is full of references to the apex of all relational facets:
love. He references it 58 times, second only to the Psalms with 79 occurrences
(NKVJ). One of my favorite of all of these verses, which include John 3:16 by
the way, is the following, and I feel it wraps up my overall point quite well:
John
15:15 NLV "I no longer call you slaves, because a master doesn't confide
in his slaves. Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the
Father told me."
In
summation, God did not design us to be slaves, bending to his every command,
but instead allowed us the freedom of choice and even lets us in on His plans,
thus setting the stage for a real relationship with Him involving trust,
sacrifice, communication, time, even intimacy. As such, I hold myself to the
rule of always keeping it real with God, as true friends do.
